I’m equally enjoying the short meditations throughout the day, as well as the mid-length ones I do typically early in the morning and also mid afternoon to rejuvenate my mind and body.

But some times, once in a while, I have a “bad” meditation experience during the mid-length ones. The worst one was this last Monday night’s class. To finish the class, we were going to do a mid-length breath meditation. I’m usually pretty good at breath meditation, which I think I developed during yoga, but this one time it was horrid.

I started to feel claustrophobic, anxious, frustrated, antsy, and generally horrible. I couldn’t sit still and all I wanted to do was bolt. I’ve had this feeling before, and I usually do interrupt the meditation and come back to it later on in the day, but this time I was in class, and I didn’t feel as if I could leave, so I sat through it.

It was probably the worst 10-12 minutes I’ve had in a loooooong time. When it was over, I mentioned it to Eric and he explained that these “bad” meditations do happen, and what I have to determine is whether it gets better as the meditation goes along, in which case I stick with it, or if it gets worse, in which case, I should stop the meditation. He said it tends to happen to younger folks who meditate who may have more energy in them.

Thankfully I haven’t had another bad meditation session, in fact, I just came out of a very nice one a few minutes ago…. lovely.

I’ve had 3 meditation classes now and it’s working out surprisingly well. I guess it’s not really an unfamiliar topic since yoga is very much “moving meditation”. What I particularly like about Eric’s teachings is that it’s very practical. He doesn’t push his students to do 1 hour meditations, instead, he encourages us to do mini meditations throughout the day.

These mini meditations really help relax the body and mind. It constantly reminds me to bring myself into the present, something I had struggled to understand in yoga until Eric explained it in class. It was like all of a sudden, “click”, I got what books and yoga teachers were talking about when they refer to stillness and being in the present.

I love that meditative feeling. I use to love it in shavasana, and now I can enjoy it without specifically doing yoga. Not saying I don’t want to get back into ashtanga, I do! My ass is expanding recently and I wouldn’t mind keeping it in shape and incorporating both yoga and meditation regularly in my life.

I have been starting to stretch more and I can feel some of my flexibility come back, although I still have a long way to go since it’s been over a year since I have a regular practice. Oh well, life is still good at the moment, despite the constant stresses.

Namaste.

Hmm… so the yoga isn’t going anywhere yet as is evident in my highly, highly infrequent posting on this blog. I still don’t have a regular practice and I can probably say I’m back to square one or close to it. I could give many reasons for this, yet they don’t really matter, point it, yoga isn’t happening.

But at least I’m trying my hand at meditation. I was recommended Eric Harrison from the Perth Meditation Centre and he’s very good at giving practical classes on meditation minus any religious or fancy jargon.

I had my first class last night and what I realised was that I was already familiar with meditation. The techniques I had used in shavasana were the same techniques we learned last night. We used 3 different meditation objects, listening to sound, body scanning and breath count. I remember being guided through a body scan and being told to keep my mind on my breathing during shavasana, but I also incorporated breath count and listening to sounds to my own shavasana practice. I would slip into a meditative state without consciously knowing it.

So now I’m aiming to incorporate more meditation into my daily life while things settle down and I can get back to some sort of routine that includes yoga.

By the way, Eric’s book “The Art of Awareness” is very good, practical guide to learn how to meditate.

Waking up in the morning has gotten easier all of a sudden. Maybe it’s all the weird time zones I’ve been flying in and out of. Whatever it is, I’m glad that mornings are almost… dare I say it?… enjoyable.

I woke up at 7 and prepared for practice. This usually involves changing into some yoga gear, brushing and tying my hair up, brushing my teeth, washing my face and laying out the mat (oh my lovely purple, cotton mat, how I’ve missed you!). I don’t shower since I’m going to get all sweaty anyway, but if I were to attend a class, I’d shower (I’m self conscious about body odour). All this takes me about 15 minutes.

I had a time limit today, I had to finish by 8 am the latest. I got to do pretty much the exact same practice as a couple days ago, shortened standing, a couple of primary then I had to finish as I was running out of time. I wouldn’t usually mind only a 30 minute practice, but I was feeling so good today. So much better than the previous practice (which was good to begin with!). I just wanted to keep going.

I needed a bit of a warm up stretch of the hamstrings as they were screaming at me the moment I got out of bed. I just did a bit of a paschimattanasana then I could get started and once I finished sun sals A, the hamstrings were feeling great. My upper body was also sore, but more from strength training than “over-stretching”, it’s a different soreness feeling.

I don’t know what the plans are for tomorrow morning. I may go for a bike ride, I may do some yoga, I may do both.

It’s been a long, long, long while since I’ve written anything here. It feels like it’s been even longer that I’ve had any sort of practice resembling yoga.

I can’t believe it’s already over a year since the accident and I still haven’t managed to get back into any sort of regular practice.

I’m hoping all this will change in 2008. Yesterday, I did my first decent practice (and it was a morning practice too!) since, who knows when, and I’m sore as I’ve never been before and strangely, it feels good.

I only managed sun sals., shortened standing sequence and a couple of poses in primary series before I was out of any oomph and went to the closing sequence. It took about half an hour, a far cry from my previous 90 minute sessions, but it’ll come again. I don’t want to push it too hard.

I had no strength, no stamina, no flexibility, and I’m about 5 kg (about 11 pounds) heavier than my usual weight but I’m saying, “Who gives a flying firefly”, I feel good.

I didn’t practice today, I went for a bike ride instead to work on some aerobic fitness. I did warm up prior to the bike ride with sun salutations, but I don’t consider that yoga, I consider it a warm up.

I’m looking forward to practicing tomorrow again. Something I haven’t said in a long time.

Namaste.

Since I’ve been struck down with a pretty bad case of a cold, I haven’t gotten any practice in. So instead, here’s another yoga lolcat:

Lolz.

My neck and shoulders have been bugging me lately. It’s the desk job thing, bending over a pile of paperwork and staring into a computer screen all day.

I’ve been taking it easy with getting back into yoga but perhaps it’s time to do more. I’m hoping the blood flow would help ease the knots in my muscles.

Speaking of which, practice has been nice and relaxing. I’ve been doing evening practices simply because I can’t get myself out of bed in the freezing cold of the dead of morning. I’m thinking once the weather warms up again, I can move my practice to the morning again.

Could it be? That I’ve ‘grown’ out of yoga? It’s been so long since I’ve done any sort of practice that I’m not sure if I even remember what to do! Ok… so that’s just a melodramatic statement on my part.

I don’t really have any excuses as to why I haven’t practiced. Truth is that it just doesn’t matter what the reasons are, fact is, I haven’t practiced in months. And with no practice, comes no yoga blogging.

I could say it was the accident, the lack of motivation, not going to class, pre-occupation with work or other interests such as gardening taking up my spare time. Thing is, I’ve always been a believer that if it’s something you want to do, you find the time to do it. So it leaves me wondering whether I’ve lost interest in, or grown out of yoga, but if I’ve lost interest in the past few months, then why am I constantly thinking about it again?

Or am I just over-thinking this and should just shut my brain up and get on with starting over again?

This year has been a strange year so far, filled with good and bad events.

It’s a bad year for yoga, so far. I’ve been back from America for nearly 2 weeks and my practice is still erratic.

It’s a good year in terms of business prospects for our online art project.

It’s been a bad year because of the accident in January.

It’s been a good year in that I’ve learned a lot about myself and the people around me because of the accident.

It’s a good year because I have a baby nephew who’s cute as a button.

It’s a bad year because my grandmother passed away yesterday.